that time of year... and no it's not a seasonal holiday/celebration i'm talking about

Yep, it's that time of year again. That time when flyers get passed around faster than you can do a 360 pivot on your foot. That time when walls are no longer recognisable as walls but as bulletin boards pasted with manifestos and posters. That time of year when people band together in groups and go around blasting their car horns and spout nonesense into hailers. Well i suppose the whole of Malaysia, or at least university students in Malaysia, should know what i'm talking about.

That's right, I'm talking about campus election.

Before I embarked on a journey as an undergraduate at one of the top universities in Malaysia (ahem... LOL), I never imagine politics to be part of the deal. After all, the university is supposed to be ground zero for harvesting knowledge. This is supposed to be the place untouched by the outside world and where the only king is Knowledge and the queen, Lady Wisdom. But what do you know, it's also the breeding ground for politics and power mongering. Forget the general elections and by-elections. I'm drowning in the last place I expected to have this sort of crap.

Why do I say that?

Well first of all, these so called 'student leaders' are nothing but empty cans. And what do empty cans do? Yeah, that's right - they rattle and make a hell of a lot of noise, but have nothing to show. Thing is, they keep going on and on and on, talking about making changes and making the same promises that the previous student leaders made and failed to fulfill. And just as they failed, so will these soon-to-be student leaders. Why do I say that? Well there's a saying that tells us to learn from the past, and the past has proven again and again that 'failure' is a secret middle name for all student leaders.

C'mon! Are you kidding me? Who's gonna believe you can deliver your promise in the short academic year that you're in power? Your predecessors managed to do jack squat, what makes you think you can do more? If you say you'll screw up even worse than they did then maybe I'll believe you. Look around you. The things you promised are unrealistic. There's no changing anything around here without everyone backing you up. You wanna improve the commuter bus service, hell go ahead! Give it your best shot. Goodluck convincing the company to replace their old but still fully functional buses with brand new ones. You wanna have cheaper food sold at the cafeteria? Convince the wholesalers who sell the rice, flour, meat, chicken, veggies, the whole nine yards to the cafeteria operaters to sell at a lower price first, then come back and talk about selling cheaper food.

Bottom line is, don't make promises you can't keep. You know all these things are virtually impossible to achieve even in the long run, and even more so in one lousy academic year. We know it too. We ain't dumb, we're university students remember? You can't fool us because you're using the same tactics that politicians use to persuade and convince the whole nation.

And speaking of politicians, haven't you guys learned anything yet from the goings on taking place in the Malaysian political arena? Hell, in any political arena for that matter? Change takes time! If the government who by the way holds elections every five years can't do squat, then you have about the same amount of chance to anything as a snowball does in hell.

And for a student body that's supposed to be on the same side as the university, you guys sure are doing a way superb job of setting good examples. It's been more than two years I've been in this university, and the whole damn time I get 'go green' and 'recycle' and 'sustainable lifestyle' shoved down my throat. I'm told to reduce plastic, recycle paper, don't print unecessarily, don't use polystyrene, keep the environment clean. And every damn time, you guys are the one to go againts those policies.

Look around and what do I see? Flyers and posters littering the floor, covering walls, slipped under  dormitory doors, forced into an unwilling victim's and by an overzealous supporter. Hell, there's so many posters lying around the university could do away with paint and just cover the walls with them. Where's your 'go green' policy now? Where's your 'sustainable lifestyle' now? You frown on anyone who wastes paper, and yet here you are doing the very same thing you've been advocating against. There's a name for people who do that, it's called 'hypocrite'. And the name of your actions? Double standards.

And for your information, dear student leader candidates, I do NOT appreciate my peace and quiet being disrupted by car horn-happy maniacs waving hailers in a car rigged with really loud stereos. We know you're desperate but we don't care. Who wants to listen to you going around campus yelling your bullshit propaganda while the stereo blasts some crappy music and your groupies honk away on their car horns behind you? Seriously? You think I'm gonna vote after that? I wasn't impressed when you were all quiet, and I'm certainly not impressed now.

With all due respect, I will not be voting for any of you. I didn't vote for your predecessors, and I won't start voting now. If you're not happy about that, sue me. If you're not happy about what I wrote, sue me twice. And although it's impossible since you're not handling them, I hope you choke on your ballots tomorrow.